Friends

I realized today that I have amazing friends. Today was a big day for seeing old friends and catching up with people I have known for years, but I have come to the conclusion that they were simply filling in the gaps. they were people that I didn't really like, but hung out with because there was no one else. They were just there, they didn't hold any interest for and, and I an immeasurably great-full to my parents for changing my school.
Now to the real topic of conversation, my current group. The most lovely and honest congregation of people I have ever met. I say this with a dry mouth, they can be absolutely terrible to each other (and to me) but I think that I love them all the more for it, because at the end of the day, they are the people I still want to see, and we seem to be able to get over most of the complications associated with having such a large and diverse group of people in a situation like a high school. I love them all, some more than others, but I think that is to be expected of any crowd of teenage girls.
To all my amazingly lovely friends out there, and you know who you are. I love you all and I am one lucky girl. <3

Love

I realized today that I think I'm in love. Not that deep seeded love tat lasts for years and years, but the kind that all teenagers experience. The kinda that is soul warming and heat breaking. That you can't change, deny or really do anything about, because guess what, he has a GIRLFRIEND! and not a girl, who is a friend either, a let's-sit-outside-our-study-class-and-make-out and a I-love-you-so-much-and-I-think-you-are-the-kindest-and-most-amazing-person-in-the-world-and-I-hope-we-stay-together-forever-and-let's-exchange-rings-and-lose-our-virginity-together kinda of girlfriend.
Sooooooo, what to do. Should I continue my convert love affair with the most gorgeous, witty and intelligent guy in the world, or should I try to "break it off"? (A somewhat stupid question, as there is nothing to break off, except the bus rides home)
When i think about it, I realize something. I don't want to break it off, even if I can't have him, why can't I just spend time with him, enjoy being in his presence, and enjoy just having him for a short time him?
He is not mine, and to that girl out there, you know who you are, I can only say one thing. You one dam lucky girl to have such a great guy.